Grisham and the snake...

Book update: Finished The Testament this afternoon. Good book. Featured an oft rehabbed ex-lawyer sent to the remote swamplands of the Pantanal to locate a female missionary who, unbeknownst to her, just inherited $11 billion from her estranged, recently deceased father.

So that's 2 books in 11 days. 630 total pages. I'm on a roll--and not ashamed of the nerd it makes me.

Makes me wonder, though...where was this motivation to read in High School? Or, um...college?

To be fair, it's not that I didn't read, it's that I didn't read the things I was supposed to. Whoops.

Next selection: The Appeal - John Grisham

Reckon I'll keep on the Grisham kick until I get bored or hit a lull. This one, 324 pages.

Embarrassing Story Time:

- Bear with me on the set-up, as it helps with the story's hilarity.

Remember the dude [Nate O'Riley] from the book? Well as he's working his way through the Pantanal, he naturally encounters several creatures he's not used to seeing in his typical suburban D.C. lifestyle. He doesn't mind it a bit--it's an adventure, after all--until the topic of snakes is brought up. At one point, they come upon an anaconda. All black, approximately 12 inches wide and 8 feet long. Just reading about this made me squirm. I haaaaate snakes.

As I begin my run, I look around at the clear country air, calm trees, thinking 'Man am I glad I'm here in the country and not the Pantanal--no anacondas here!'

And THEN...about a mile in, I see a big, black snake on the left side of the dirt road, not 10 feet in front of me. No anaconda, mind you, but, um...it's a freaking snake! Probably three inches in width, four feet long [estimates]. Needless to say, I panicked. Slammed on the breaks like a hockey player sliding to a stop in front of a goalie. Made an abrupt turn to go back the way I came and--TWIST went the knee. Ouch! Had to limp most the way home--and all around the house since then. Thankfully, the snake did not follow me home.

And that is my snake story.

As a follow-up to the story, this conversation ensued:

Me: "That was my favorite route to run, too...won't be taking that way for awhile now."
Mom: "Yeah, because the snake will be there waiting for you."
Me: "I know! That's what HE said. He said 'Don't come back 'round here or I'm gonna f*ckin' eat you.'"
Mom: "I bet he did."
Me: "Where did I lose you on the story's believability?"
Mom: "Go away, Derrick."
Me: "Dang it. Well it was still pretty scary."
Mom: "I know."

Snakes are bad,

Derrick

Warning: If you read this, you'll learn something new...

I'm a pretty open cat, if you know me. Finding a secret on me is like finding a needle made from hay in...well, you know--a haystack.

But I decided to dig deep and come up with some things that some folks may not know about me. I do this every-so-often, and figured I was due. Some of these things are quite embarrassing--but alas...

- In 2nd grade, I wanted to be a preacher when I grew up.

- I'd had a long day at school and basketball practice the day before my grandfather died--so I told my mom I'd pass on visiting him in the hospital. Doctors assured us his condition wasn't serious, and he'd be fine. No worries, I figured--I'd see him in a few days. He passed away in the middle of the night. My decision that day still bothers me sometimes.

- My first kiss was approximately 6 weeks before my 18th birthday.

- I would marry (______) today, if she let me.

- I had this High School classmate--real cool chica. I've said occasionally for years (almost always to myself) that I definitely wouldn't mind marrying a girl exactly like her someday. I can't think of anyone who knows (guessing aside) who I'm referring to.

- If I don't have a kid before December 19, 2014--I will consider myself a major disappointment.

- The first episode of SportsCenter I ever recall watching was on November 7, 1991. It remains the most memorable thing I've ever seen on ESPN. I couldn't actually find an ESPN clip--they appear to be stingy with their rights--but here's one from CNN. It's 9:56 long, but you'll get the idea very shortly.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iSfy4AhDDnw

- I did not go to my High School graduation. People insisted I'd regret it, but truth be told, I often even forget that I didn't go. My college graduation was much more important to me. I went to that one--almost entirely for my mom.

- I absolutely love Pretty Prairie, KS. There, I said it.


- I love to sing. Almost exclusively in my car. Primarily along with various country songs, but not that part's not exclusive. I'm convinced I'm pretty okay at it, too.

- I was 100% comfortable with my weight until 2005. My college basketball coach (Jones, not Trimmell--Trimmell was too busy being a good person, and winning games to ever demean his players) made several comments about it. Even resorted to cheap name-calling. To this day, I am self-conscious about my weight because of that man. I think about it at least a dozen times a day.

- I have never been in a relationship with anyone on Facebook. I've also never had a girlfriend in the summertime. Or the fall, now that I think about it. More specifically, never between June-October. Whoa...

One last one that I'm borrowing from a flick (gee, guess which one), but I always liked it, and it holds true for me, too...

- "I could be fun, if you want. I could be pensive, uhh...smart, superstitious, brave? And I, uhh--I can be light on my feet. I could be whatever you want. You just tell me what you want, and I'm gonna be that for you."

"You're dumb."

- "I could be that."

Do the right thing,
Derrick

This is why I'm not running...

Day 14: INcomplete
Week 2: Complete

Morning session: 6.03 miles
Evening session: 0 miles
Total distance: 6.03 miles

Today was a big disappointment. It was 107 degrees at around 5:45 PM (about an hour before my scheduled run), so I decided to go to Pizza Hut with my mom and brother, and run when I got back.

But it stormed like crazy until dark, and then I had an important, hour-long phone talk with one of my best friends, Katie--running was pretty much out of the question by then, anyway. So needless to say, the day--the whole week, really--was a letdown. :(

Here's a video here, in case you don't believe me. I'm a weird dude. You've been warned...

**Late added editor's note...OK, that was a tease. Stupid thing won't upload for the life of me. I tried and tried, but it's 1 AM, and it's just not working. Too bad, too, because I found it rather comical.**

Darn it.

Week 2 stats:

73.20 miles--10.43 miles/day
4.0 lbs lost

July stats, up-to-date:

163.63 miles--11.69 miles/day
9.5 lbs lost

Comparison:

Week 1: 90.43 miles
Week 2: 73.20 miles

While I am still on pace to reach my goal of 300 miles for the month, my drop-off concerns me. I need a big day tomorrow (I'm thinking 15+ miles), and as a result of a sluggish week 2 showing, I may not attend rodeo at all, after all. Unless I get some cool out-of-town friends in the area, then I could probably head up. We'll see...

Glory Road now...


D, out